Consequence: something produced by a cause or necessarily following from a set of conditions. So says Mr. Webster. I’m not completely convinced young people (and some of us older people) understand this word. Perhaps it is archaic and not pertinent to their lives. Maybe I am old fashioned for thinking that consequences still exist? It would seem our world has totally abandoned the idea that every action and word is accompanied by consequences.
What has caused me to be so old fashioned and fuddy-duddy-ish today? It might have something to do with our discussion of holiness at Bible study on Tuesday morning. My ladies group is doing my study From the Trash Pile to the Treasure Chest: Creating a Godly Legacy and this week’s discussion was on Chapter 5—The Pursuit of Holiness. We talked about how, if Christians are to live holy lives, we must act in ways that are different and peculiar to the world. We must be aware that our every action and word has consequences. Let’s look at one example that I share in my Bible study. Let us consider how we, as women, dress. Allow me to share an excerpt from Week 5 of the study with you to illustrate my point.
Hands down, it qualifies as the worst vacation I have ever taken. Greg and I had only been married a short while, and we decided to go to San Francisco for a long weekend. I had lived for a few months in the Bay area earlier in my single life and wanted to show him the beauty of the California coast. We left home, eager to enjoy some time away seeing San Francisco. That is where the trouble began.
I had purchased what I considered to be a very cute, short denim wrap dress for the trip. I decided to wear it to travel to San Francisco. I put it on, along with a pair of sandals, and out the door we went. I noticed that Greg was very quiet on our drive to the Atlanta airport, but my excitement about our vacation caused me to dismiss his quietness completely. When we arrived at the airport, we checked our baggage and began the very long walk to the gate where we would board our plane. I noticed that Greg walked several paces behind me the entire time, but again, I did not give it much thought.
We arrived in San Francisco, collected our bags, got the rental car, and made our way to our hotel. By this time, it was obvious that something was not right with Greg. We got into our hotel room, and I said to him, “You have been very quiet, and you walked behind me, rather than with me, most of the day. Is something wrong?
Greg proceeded to inform me that my very cute dress was way too short and revealed things that should not be revealed. He suggested that I looked like one of Rahab’s co-workers, if you know what I mean!
I was offended and incredibly angry with him. I had not purposely set out to look like a prostitute, and I told him so in no uncertain terms. He reasoned that obviously I had, since I had chosen to wear the dress that I was wearing. We argued for a long while with no resolution. I was not backing down, and neither was he. I said that maybe I should just get on a plane and go home. He said that maybe he should too, because he had no intention of being embarrassed by the way I dressed for the entire vacation. Neither of us did, but it was mighty quiet in our hotel room for most of the trip.
At the time I did not realize how on target he was, nor would I have admitted it. I did not view my dress as inappropriate or more revealing than outfits worn by any other twenty-somethings living in the mid-nineties. From my front view in the full-length mirror, the dress hit me at mid-thigh. Because the dress was a wrap style, the view from the back was obviously very different—and that was the crux of the problem.
Ponder what Titus says about the behavior of Christian women. In Titus 2:3–5, God instructs older women to teach the younger women how to live reverent lives. Listen to this passage from The Message: “Guide older women into lives of reverence so they end up as neither gossips nor drunks, but models of goodness. By looking at them, the younger women will know how to love their husbands and children, be virtuous and pure, keep a good house, be good wives. We don’t want anyone looking down on God’s Message because of their behavior.”31
When Greg and I argued about the intent of my dress on that day in San Francisco, we were both right. Truly, I had no intention of looking like a prostitute. I simply had no idea how the way I dressed was perceived.
For the rest of the story……see Week 5, Day 3 of From the Trash Pile to the Treasure Chest: Creating a Godly Legacy.
MEDITATION MOMENT: Ladies, we could easily be causing men and boys to stumble (consequence) by the way we dress….even though it is not our intention. Do your tops show too much cleavage? Are your skirts and shorts so short that when you sit, your underwear can be seen? Are your pants too tight? I promise you this is happening in our churches today. I’ve seen it in my own church in teens and older women. Share here how we can make a difference in this area of modest dressing in our own spheres of influence?
