Today I have the privilege of offering you a guest post by my sweet friend, Alene Snodgrass. Alene is a Texas girl who loves Jesus with all her heart. In the past year, Alene lost her Dad, which is a very hard thing for us girls. Most of us are hugely attached to our daddy. I lost my daddy seven years ago and not a day goes by that I don’t miss him like crazy, so I can totally identify with Alene’s post. Here’s a bit about Alene.
Struggling to know who she was, Alene Snodgrass became aware of the self-doubt and insecurities that were tearing her down. Alene now shares stories and experiences on her blog, Positively Alene, to encourage others who are seeking and searching. As the Director of Volunteers at a church, Bay Area Fellowship Westside Campus, who serves those living in poverty she loves to help others reach their full potential despite their circumstances. For more information visit her website at www.alenesnodgrass.com. You can also connect with her on Facebook or Twitter.
I Quit
Have you ever wanted to quit? Have you ever craved the past or the way things used to be? I couldn’t believe it, but that’s right where I found myself recently.
Somewhere in the midst of decision-making, calls, visitation, and the funeral for my daddy, I found myself questioning. People showed up and sent sympathy cards that I hadn’t seen in years. While respectful as that seems, it messed with my heart. Many of those friends were the ones who had walked out years ago, when I needed them most.
I had been praying for an awakening. I was tired of “doing” church and still feeling empty. My spirituality had become nothing more than a check-off list. As I continually prayed, God began to stir within me a breath of fresh spirit-filled air.
God spoke things to my soul that I had to obey, which meant breaking “tradition.” As I stepped into uncharted waters longing for God to hold me firmly, I quickly realized my friends didn’t understand and had turned their backs.
As I grieved my daddy and continually met with people and read their sweet cards, I found myself confused. I found myself longing for their friendship once again. I missed the times we were together.
Yes, I thought I’d never say I quit, but it was there on the tip of my tongue!
The day after the funeral I was booked to attend a conference. I reluctantly went and felt lost, void of emotion, and unconnected during worship. As the speaker took the stage, I wrote notes copiously. My heart knew she was talking to me. “Don’t quit. Circumstances don’t matter. God will honor the promises He has spoke to your heart.”
As it ended, I walked out as quickly as I could. And there in the dark, cold night I heard, “Alene.” I stopped. I could vaguely make out the silhouette of a friend who had had me come speak to her women’s ministry.
We hugged and she began, “God nudged me to tell you something.” My heart stopped. I have been chastised and belittled by people who have started their conversations with, “God told me to tell you.”
She went on, “Alene, He says, ‘don’t quit.’ He has a plan. He will continue to speak to you because you follow Him and not others.”
My heart was breaking at that point. How did she know I came to quit? She continued, “My husband told me a story about how you got ridiculed for doing things differently. I’ve watched you and your ministry; you listen to God. That’s why I had you come speak. I wanted someone who listened to God and obeyed. Please, don’t quit. Keep going.”
As we walked off in the dark of the night, my heart ached for the past where I had things in common with friends from long ago. My soul, however, heard those precious words spoken into a grieving and tired soul.
If you have an aching heart and want to quit, don’t.
If you are grieving the past, look toward the future.
If you need a word from the Lord, hear Him say . . .
“Don’t quit. Keeping going.”
